Yes yes!! Happy new year to one and all reading this! I hope ya'll had a great time for NYE and a good year for 2007. Let's hope for a much better year ahead and wish for all things good and more world peace for sure.

It's just getting crazier, this world. Need I even mention Benazir's uncalled for assasination? Just when the year was about to end, a good lady's life came to an abrupt end. *sigh* She was a powerhouse is what I personally think and a good democratic leader who wanted good things done for her nation. I also very personally think that the bottom line here is men can never handle women who are better off than them in every other way. They cannot fathom the fact that we(women) can predominate them in whichever trade, business, industry or what-nots it's gonna be. They have far too much ego to accept that. So, what do they do? Resort to the easiest way out. Get rid of the possible opponent so that it makes things easier for them. Men, for some dumb ass reason, are unable to use their wits to match up with a woman of equal power or status as them. Agreed? Not men-bashing here or anything. But I think it's quite an undeniable fact. Haha! =P

Anyways, with that said, I think Benazir Bhutto's death was really uncalled for. Such a sad end to her life. And to think that they actually covered up her assasination saying she died cos she hit her head on the car is just pure absurdity! The theories people come up with once a person is no longer alive to defend back! Madness I tell you!

Ok ok. I will stop with the politics already. =P 
I just wanted to let you guys know that I am moving to blogspot. This is my last entry here. I have no intention of deleting this blog. It still remains. Too many memories la. Just that henceforth, all future entries will be at my new blogspot page.

www.kanzywanzy.blogspot.com

Ok guys! Have yourselves a blessed year and all the best! Later! =)

I am back to that fucked up feeling again. It's back. I can't shake it off. It's all because of a stupid dream that I had to have. Not that I regret having that dream. Just that, when I finally got over the whole phase, it came bouncing right back into my head again and I'm totally bummed out. I know ya'll might be thinking it's just a dream and all. But umm.. no one would really understand what this dream means to me. No one. It's easy to say I'll do fine and all. But, it's really not that easy. I can tell you that. One dream that I can never ever forget for always. Right now, I don't know what to do, or say or even think. I am confused. Yet again. *sighs*

Why do I always go through shit like this? It's draining me emotionally. Oh, did I mention that I also keep meeting jerks? Now, that is just taking a toll on me already. I was telling a good friend online that I have lost the strength already. I feel so weak and vulnerable this time. I can't seem to pick myself up and say move on and let it go. I can't do it. I can just feel that something just doesn't feel right this time around. I don't know man. It's crazy what goes through the head and the heart acts against it all the time. Crazy. Did I make any sense to you at all? *shrugs* Oh well..........

By the way, one song relates to exactly what I am feeling right now
(just the female bits that is), which has been running on repeat on my player. Keep reading.

That's how much I love you
That's how much I need you
And I can’t stand you
Must everything you do
Make me wanna smile?
Can I not like it for awhile?

No...

but you won’t let me
You upset me girl
then you kiss my lips
All of a sudden I forget
that I was upset
Can’t remember what you did

But I hate it

You know exactly what to do
So that I can’t stay mad at you
For too long, that’s wrong

But I hate it

You know exactly how to touch
So that I don’t wanna fuss and fight no more
So I despise that I adore you

And I hate how much I love you boy
I can’t stand how much I need you
And I hate how much I love you boy
But I just can’t let you go
And I hate that I love you so..

And you completely know the power that you have
The only one that makes me laugh

Sad and it’s not fair how you take advantage of the fact that I
Love you beyond the reason why
And it just ain’t right

And I hate how much I love you girl
I can’t stand how much I need you
And I hate how much I love you girl
But I just can’t let you go
But I hate that I love you so

One of these days maybe your magic won’t affect me
And your kiss won’t make me weak
But no one in this world knows me the way you know me
So you’ll probably always have a spell on me..

That’s how much I love you
How much I need you
That’s how much I need you
That’s how much I love you
That’s how much I need you

And I hate that I love you sooo...
And I hate how much I love you boy
I can’t stand how much I need you
And I hate how much I love you boy
But I just can’t let you go
And I hate that I love you so

And I hate that I love you so.. so..

Yup... so I guess he will probably always have a spell on me. *sighs*

After a hiatus, I decided to make a rare appearance just before October ends. Everyone tells me to update on daily happenings or at least some happenings. Once again, I hate to admit it but yes... laziness sure as hell gets the better of me. *grins*

But anyways, after my happening party, some stuff happened. At home, at work and in my personal life. At home, my mum was heavily into getting me married off. Yes, your read it right. She wanted to marry me off soon so she was looking for a groom through a broker. If you had read my recent entries I think you would have noticed that I mentioned that we met up with one of these potential grooms. That was my first ever proposal and it was a put off. Following that, I had 4 others proposals all of which just did not appeal to me, so I actually said no to all of it.

Now, the only reason I agreed to this arranged marriage thingy was to make my mum happy. I can soo bloody relate to Ket and I'm sure she can relate to me pertaining to keeping the parents happy, so we agree to what they wish for. See, my mum probably had the idea that I was never gonna look for someone for myself and resorted to this. So it was sorta like all talk and no action for awhile. I was happy for awhile cos I thought my mum had given up on the idea. Unfortunate for me, that was short lived. She was rolling right back into that super naggy "Kanges, you need to settle down soon!" shit... I tell you.. It was the worst phase of my life right after my heart break with someone. I couldn't handle it. I was so stressed out. Majorly stressed out. She hurt me with some of the words she used just to make her point. But of course she wouldn't have thought that I would get hurt by it cos I always put up a brave or rather strong front at home. But  yea.. truth is, I was hurt. Her words pierced right through me. I broke down a couple of times. But no one knew. Until now that I mentioned this that is. It really got to me. Then I finally decided that she had to stop cos I was nowhere near ready to get married anytime soon.
I was at my breaking point. That was it for me. I could no longer tolerate it.
I went right up to her and pretty much gave a huge salvo for whatever she had me putting up with. And guess what? The salvo worked. She actually agreed to some (yes only some) of the stuff I said. I am glad to say that since then, not a word of marriage has surfaced in my household. I am proud of myself. Hehe.. *pats back*I am guessing she has given me the space to find someone for myself. The occasional teeny weeny bits of nagging is there. But yea. I am coping well now & it's all good.

At work, I sorta fell out with a colleague. Nothing very major. But I think they know now to not mess around with me. I have started talking with this person and this person sure as hell knows to keep limits with me. Hmm... I make it sound like I am some big gangster right? Haha! No la.. when you know that limits are being crossed time and time again, and you are just a colleague, you should keep within your boundaries. Everything else at work is going very well. I am very happy here otherwise. Come 1st November, I would have touched my first year with this company. Looking forward to more years simply because I am really comfortable with my job. It's really my second home. Apart from the current problem with one colleague, everyone else are like family. We have lunch together, that is cooked by my security officer and stuff. We have teatime on some days where once again my S.O Guna whips up a yummylicious treat or two, so you see.. It's a nice homely feel to it. That's why I am still here, after almost a year. =)

My personal life, particularly the love life has been pretty mundane for this year. I am so finally over that someone who broke my heart the first time and completely shattered it the second time around. We have been sorta catching up online the last couple of weeks and I have come to realise that I no longer have that butterflies in my stomach feeling or my heart either skipping a beat or that sinking feeling whenever I chat with him. I am so glad I am over him. He is one fickle minded fella who doesn't know what he wants in his own love life. But I can tell that, reality has struck him smack on his head this time and he has changed quite abit. I am happy for him. I've always wanted the best for him and hope he is happy in whatever he does, wherever he is and whoever he is going to be with. =)
As of right now, for me, there is one guy who I'm actively talking to like almost daily. He's nice. We haven't met yet. But I think he is sweet enough cos he smses me everyday morning before he leaves for work and calls in the evening after he gets back. It could be nothing at all. I mean maybe he is like that by nature. Or there could be more. I wouldn't know. And we haven't met yet. But yea.. he is a nice chap to talk to and all for now. The attractive factor for this guy is the fact that he makes the effort to talk to me at least everyday. I haven't had that kind of attention from a guy for awhile now. Haha.. pathetic?? I know right... But hey.. it's a nice feel la.

Okay. You can stop scolding or mumbling cos I'm ending this entry here. Hehe!
Oh before I forget, let's welcome November 2007 with open arms and pray for better things to come to each of us and let me also wish all my hindu friends a very Happy Deepavali!! God bless ya'll!
***Mmmmuuaaaccckkkkkzzzzzzz***

Finally I decided on updating the blog. Hehehe.... Cos I have a reason to la.. Really really! All these days, I kept looking at my blog and drafted a coupla entries. Then kept editing it. Then I decided not to post it in the end cos it was all nothing much la. But now, I got some photos to show and some stuff to write about! Hehehe!

Let me start off by saying a big thank you to all my dearest friends and family who made my birthday party on the 22nd Sept a huge success! Thank you, thank you and thank you!! I have to say I loved all the lovely gifts I received from all of ya'll.  Niceee..... I likeee!!! 

Actually, I had no intention of doing anything big for my birthday this year at all. I thought, it was just gonna be another simple celebration as it always has been the last coupla years. And it so happened that out dearest Sumi was gonna throw a party for her 25th.. then it kinda struck me to do mine cos I was turning a quarter of a century old too! Hehe! So, then started the preps for the whole thing just 2 weeks back. Although it was sucha super last minute decision, I am really glad that I managed to pull it off. Everything went very well. But of course not without the help of my good friends, Subashini & Priya and my lovely sister, Sugan! Thank you gals soooo much! And for the rest like Vicky for being such an entertaining emcee for all my guests, Rey, Banu & Bharathi for helping out with the food preps and getting the cake and stuff, and definitely the rest of my friends and family who have helped me in one way or the other to have the party go well.... THANK YOU ALL VERY MUCH!! I owe you guys one!

I have to credit my sister Sugan for doing my make-up on that day. I think she did a pretty good job if I could say so myself! Thanks gal! She helped me pick out my top for my bash, together with Naz and Nolee. They made me wear PINK ley!! Only they will know what a hard time I gave them whilst shopping for my clothes! Hahahahah! I am sorry gals. But you know what, they somehow managed to convince me to get the pink top in the end! I hate to admit it, but I actually like the top.. like ALOT! And mind you, this is coming from a person who totally detests the color pink and refuses to haf anything to do with that color ok! So dun be surprised to see me in pink more often eh.. hehehe! With that said, I will take leave now and let ya'll view my photos in the link given below. I seem to have some difficulty uploading photos here. The photos can be viewed at my Flickr page. Enjoy!   

http://www.flickr.com/photos/14121626@N06/

So............... :) Yeah, yeah. I decided to blog again. As you would have already noticed, it's been over a year! Seriously right, I gave up on blogging after not updating it from like a month or two since the last entry. Then everytime I looked at my blog, I would wanna go at it again, but I just didn't want to. I just didn't feel like it at all. It's like I just hated my blog. So, what the hell am I doing back here with an entry again you ask? I have no particular reasons for it. But I'm back. So yeah. Heh.

Anyways, lots of things happened over the last year. I mean ALOT. Oh you know what, I read through ALL my entries over the last few days. I realised that I just go on & on & on ranting away cos' all my entries were damn bloody long la!! How did ya'll put up with it?? OMG! Haha! Next time just say it to my face la. Seriously. I hated my entries you know. Pfff.......

I've made a cemented decision as soon as I started blogging this one. Never again will I make my blog readers suffer with my verbose entries. Really really. Believe me. Haha! This is already kinda long for now I think and I have even said anything abt the happenings from May last year til now. Honestly, just too many things happened. I don't want to blog about every bit of it.

Maybe just a few noteworthy matters. But then again, where do I even start from? LOL! Okay, okay. With some reference back to my last entry, my lovely sister has completed a year so far with Qatar Airways. She's having a blast working there! The places she travels to are just spectacular! Venice, Zurich and other similar destinations. Cool or what? Hee! It's extremely tiring travelling especially if you're not a passenger, but still the perks are there na. So, that's my sister's story so far. The younger one is not doing too bad herself. She is taking her certificate in pre-school teaching right now and also managed to land herself in a teaching stint in a private kindergarten, so it's all good for her too.

Oh yeah, my bestie Sheena just gave birth to her second boy on 06.06.07. Tomorrow would be exactly one month. His name's Kavinesh Ruben. He is just as adorable as the elder boy, Natesh Ruben. Ya'll remember him right, had a picture of him up in one of earlier posts. Boy has Natesh grown. I love them both! My god-sons! Weee!

At this point, everyone's probably going like " Errm... when is she gonna talk about anything to do with her?", right? Haah! Not today. It's long enough as it is.
Bottom line of this entry, I am back to the bloggin world. Embrace me again! :D

*Dusts off cobwebs*
*Coughs*
*Smashes all the spideys crawling on the screen*

I'm sorry whoever clicked on this link had to put up with all that. Heh. I actually submitted my very overdue entry yesterday. And you guessed it! The bloody entry disappeared! !^%&$%^%$#^~!@

Here I am now re-typing the whole entry again. *sighs*

Let me take you back to the 15th of April cos' it was from that date that some things happened. My beautiful & ever-so ambitious sister, Geeva, got her dream job! That being, becoming an air stewardess. And she got one of the most world renowned one. She is gonna start flying with Qatar Airways, a 5 Star airline! As cool as that sounds, it had its downsides to it. First things being, she has to be based in Doha, Qatar for 3 whole years, only coming down to Singapore as & when she has her flights to SG & of course when she takes long term leaves. It's kinda sad la. I miss her quite abit but I am getting used to her being outstation. It's the mummy that is still taking time to digest that fact. But I am hoping she gets ok with it soon. My sister is having a great time there & that is what eventually matters. As long as she is happy there, we will be very happy & reliefed here. A safe place to be in is what she mentioned. So, that is cool. Good on her I say! She left on the 15th of April & as of right now has completed about 2 weeks of training, with 5 weeks left to go & she will start flying! I'm so excited for her! Miss u & your crazyness at home Gee!
Oh, by the way Sumi, my dear... go & give it a shot with these airlines. I am pretty sure you can make it through. Just keep a lookout for their adverts or something yea? I will definitely let you know if I hear of any.  

Next up, I am not working at Starbucks anymore. I left due to some problems. So it is back to job hunting for me again I guess. I shall not whine about it here. Heh. Anyone with any permanent jobs to offer, please, drop me a comment!

And whatever happened to our IBM?? I don't see anybody else updating about it. I know Di is drafting her entry right now. But since I am at mine, I have decided to bring it up. So, what is the plan darlings? May is already here. We should slowly start picking dates & definitely places to go to.

The last update still didn't confirm the venue. So let's go through the list of places we might wanna hang out at.
1) Zoo [For the mamis who are ok with a lil' sun or rain]

2) ECP [I'm ok with that, an all girls' picnic & some good fun in the sun, sand & sea]

3) Escape Theme Park [I am game for that place anytime! Give it a thought]

4) Causeway Point [Not the most splendid idea, but hey.. memories!]

5) Bowling & Pool games at a convenient location b4 or after a
meal [Lunch/dinner]

6) Sentosa [There's the luge there to ride & maybe a small picnic?]

I can't think of anything else right now. But please, by all means, drop in your suggestions here the moment you read this! See ya!
Ciao Mami Chulas & Papi Chulos! I miss alot of ya'll badly at this moment in time! Hope to see you guys soon yea! Toodlez!!

The first weekend of March is already here! What the hell rite? It seems like just barely a month into the new year, and we have touched down on March. Wow... Amazing ain't it.. Anyways, I finally met up with Ambi, Di, Moon & Hudz after nearly 2 months plus. It was really good to see them all. As always, laughing our asses off. Missed Hudz crazy giggling & laughing for no apparent reason. *ahem* hehe! Miss Ajmoon, never let off without getting teased as always. But, had good fun nonetheless. It could have been much better if someone hadn't had to go to school... *grins*

Guess what, I finally learned how to play pool! Weeeeee!! I know, I know.. what took me this long to learn it rite? Well, for one.. I needed someone who prolly won't laugh at my antics while trying to learn the game. I found the perfect partner after so long. And he & his gang of subordinates were my "GURUs". Thanks Vinz, Kailash & Morgz! =) So, I managed to learn it pretty ok.. Just need to play a few more games & I think I will get a good hang of it.

Anyways, we went to play pool at AMK, near Breeks yesterday & watched Final Destination 3 after that. My god! That is by far the most goriest movie I have ever watched I tell ya. For those of you who haven't caught it yet, go catch it! Stunning effects man. Wow! It's so in your face kinda bloody deaths. Yikes! Still getting goosebumps thinking about the movie. It's quite good a movie, but not so lengthy. I think it was abt an hour & 45 mins or something.
I have yet to watch Pink Panther. Can't wait for X-Men III, Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu & Jilendru Oru Kaathal to open. :) I haven't watched my man's movie since Ghajini. I refused to watch Aaru only cos of Trisha. Eeww!! Can never stand her acting. SO, I kinda miss watching Surya movies. Hence looking forward to Jilendru Oru Kaathal! Di & gals.. we go watch it together-gether k! =P

I just realised that I never blogged about my dearest dearest godson Natesh Ruben in all of my entries so far. My god... kept slipping my mind. ANyways, the boy's looking as adorable as ever, entering his 7th month when 10th March comes. Time's passing really fast.  And he is learning things very fast also. He apparently has been attempting to get on his knees to start crawling!! Oooh!! So cute! I can't wait to see his baby steps & hear his first words! I know i shud prolly be worrying about my own kid.. but hey, wat the hell.. I haven't got my own yet. He wud be the next closest! =D I'll see if I can attach his post-thaipusam picture here.. alrighty, That's all folks.. til the next entry.... ciao!

That is Natesh Ruben right there playing with a doll that happens to look just like him! Haha!

Yes, 2006 came. January passed. Still you didn't see an entry until today. What am I to say? I kept saving it as a draft until I decided to finish it up today otherwise I know I'd never do it. Anyways, it wasn't that I didn't have time to, just was never in the mood. Another perk was our dearest Sumi's blog! She also updated hers & sorta motivated me to finish up mine today! =D 

I didn't exactly start off the year the best way I wanted to. It started off with me being jobless. After slogging(almost) for a year and a half at ***, they decided that they no longer need you cos all their jobs & needs have been met. Swines! That is SO shitty. Been to only one pathetic interview out of the tons of jobs I have applied for since. Also fucking unsuccessful! Surprisingly, I am still VERY patiently waiting for some of the companies to reply. After this, if all else doesn't turn out well right, I am leaving the country for good. Dead serious about that decision.

Leaving that at that, another terrible way to start off my year was when I found out that the guy I was blogging about previously, (please refer back), got attached. I just burst man! I thought I would have been able to handle it, but it hurt so bad that I just broke down. I know we weren't attached to begin with and all la, but fuck sia, they guy whom u know & thought meant so much to you, tells you he got attached, what's a girl to do! Fuck all man! Waah... I was very down for sometime. Still am a little actually. Then came along someone new I got to know through Singapore Indians. Nice chap. Chatting with him actually took my mind off things. Then one fine day, our friend suddenly declares he is in love with me! Like what the hell right! I was so shocked cos it was barely 2 months since we started chatting & now he likes me.. wow. Very hard to digest. I told him what I felt about it la, that this is not something to be rushing into only to regret it later. Also told him, I have no such feelings right now. So, leave things as they are and we shall see about it much much later. So, its been like that since then la. Nothing much going on. I need a fucking job soon. I am getting frustrated so often that everyone around me are just getting verbal thrashing from me for no apparent reason. Going mad soon if I go on like this. God help me. Sheesh. What a way to start the year. Shit balls. I pray it gets better. *Sighs*

Henceforth, this blog will be updated often enough to know what's been going on in my life. By the way, Ruoxuan & Liana, link me up & give me your links as well yea. Til then, ya'll be good. Hear me soon.

P/S: I am actually selling a mini trial pack of facial products called Sense from Usana Health Sciences, a part time business I am doing right now. I have only 3 packs of those left. Looking for any ladies out there who would be interested in getting one. Drop me a msg here or contact me at my mobile for those with my number. The set includes: Cleanser, Toner, Moisturiser, Eye Nourisher, Perfecting Essence, Rice bran scrub & Night renewal creme. Bear in mind these are all in minis. Trial pack. Going at $43. Negotiable. *winks* Gimme a ring or sms. Ciao!

I guess my heading pretty much says alot rite? I'm extremely sorry for not updating my blog for what seems forever... to me at least! I was caught up with alot of things since my last entry & of course, the laziness to just log in & type some shit was also there. Then again, maybe its for the better that I start afresh aye? :p
Oh by the way, the beer treatment worked just fine & my hair has grown quite a length since.. and much softer too! Thanks Rongz for your tip! *grins*

Oh well, I sure as hell miss blogging & I will definitely be back to blogging at the turn of the year aite! Til then, you guys take good care & merry christmas to all my frens out there!! Oh yes, advanced New Year Wishes too!! May 2006 be a much better year for all of us yea!
Cheers guys! And don't forget to make your resolutions if u you haven't already!! Adious!!

Good Bye 2005... Not bad a year. Could have been way better though. Heck it!

Welcome 2006!! Bless me(and all else) with a better year!! Weee.........!!!!!!

Seasonal greetings once again everyone!! Make sure ya'll haf fun!!

P/S: Di, I had a blast for ur birthday bash!! It was great fun sweets! Thanks for the invite yea!! =D happy belated 21st to ya babe!!

I can't wait for Ghajini to come out!! OMG!! Oh my freaking GOD!! He looks so damn damn damn GORGEOUS!! Haiyooooooo...... Buay tahan liao ar! *swoons* *And swings chair in circles*
Ya'll remember how Sumi & Ket went absolutely crazy when Anniyan was released? That is exactly what I am going through right now! Surya is just .. just... to die for in this movie. And if looks cud kill, then I must have died like a thousand times cos of Mr Surya's oh-so-gorgeous-face!! *melts*
I seriously am looking forward to the movie man! I know it's a total rip-off from the movie "Momento" la. But hell, I think no one would be able to pull that role off any better than my baby. Hee! HE is one actor, like Vikram & Kamal who can & will do anything to fit into their characters. And its because of that one factor that alotta actors are able to do well in the cinema industry. Well, as of right now, I am getting alot of various dates to the opening of the movie. But none is an ascertive one. So I'll just be patient & wait for it to be released!